The gym by work just replaced a bunch of their treadmills with Tread Climbers. What is a Tread Climber, you ask? Well, it's a cross between a treadmill and a stair climber, silly. And you know what? I tried one out, and after 20 seconds I was positive that I was going to have an embarassing, perhaps paralyzing incident if I stayed on it any longer. These things are insane, have made it even more difficult to get on a treadmill after work, and need to go away now. I hope a pack of wild baby elephants go on a rampage and destroy all of them so I can have my beloved treadmills back. That is all.

Steve Jobs calls for the end of the DRM. All who have ever purchased music on iTunes scream "hells yeah!" in unison.

I truly despise the iTunes DRM. I think iTunes as a store is a truly wonderful thing - you can browse an extensive catalog, hear snippets of songs immediately, and buy what you want immediately. For people that completely flip out when they hear something new that they like (not that I would know this from personal experience at all.... *cough*), this is just the bee's knees.

The problem arises in how the file is then authorized for your use later. From the best of my recollection, you are limited to six devices being able to use that particular file. Then (I guess), it's dead. This would be OK, if it were not for the fact that I seem to be cursed to have at least one hard drive failure a year, whether it be the hard drive on my laptop or on my iPod (usually, both go kerplunk within weeks of each other). As a result, I have now used up three of my six authorizations over just a two year period - even though I am using the same laptop and the same iPod.

The only way for me to not say goodbye to these files is to burn them as full blown audio files to a CD, then rip them back to my computer as mp3s. I cringe when thinking about how these files are going to sound after all of that.

So, someone who wants to continue to support the music industry is thereby punished for supporting the music industry, since you don't have to jump through these hoops with illegally downloaded plain ol' mp3s.

I'm just wondering why Steve Jobs is such a proponent of all this. He says iTunes' proprietary format is not incentive enough for people to continue to purchase iPods in the future, even though just about any product life cycle model would indicate that in five years, that will most likely be the case. Like, what up with that?

My iPod broke. Again. My last one puttered out after 2 years and 3 months. This one lasted a whopping one year and three months. Apple has officially made the crappiest product ever that I can't live without.

Lessons learned from the MTV Video Music Awards:

-Jared Leto is in a rock band? And they're, like, emo? And he wears eye-liner?
-All rock stars wear eye-liner now?
-People actually like Panic! At the Disco?
-How did Justin Timberlake suddenly become the savior of pop music? His new stuff is amazing.
-Jack Black isn't funny after all.
-Sarah Silverman is.
-When all is said and done, MTV tries way too hard to be hip and relevant.

Here is a list of things that I hate:

-Those little plastic pulltabs on orange juice and soy milk containers that you have to pull off when you first open them.
-The Who.
-Scenes in movies where all of a sudden the computer has all the answers. One character will sit in front of the computer and take charge, which means typing frantically on the keyboard, while at least two others watch over his shoulder with baited breath. The viewer is supposed to believe, then, that this individual can navigate through sophisticated menus filled with vector graphics right out of Tron to come across the answer, like where the bomb is or where the nuclear missile is about to detonate, without touching a mouse once. According to Hollywood, q-w-e-r-t-y can solve all the world's problems.
-People that make a statement, and then say "Why?" and then go on to answer their own question, but we've covered this already.
-Having to shake a beverage before drinking it (also, see #1).
-Turnips.
-WALKING A MILE TO THE BROOKLYN LIRR STATION IN THE FREEZING COLD, TO BE GREEETED BY A 45 MINUTE LINE TO BUY TICKETS FOR THE TRAIN, TO TAKE THE TRAIN TO JAMAICA QUEENS, TO THEN HAVE TO BE ROUTED OUT OF THE TRAIN STATION TO THE STREET BELOW, TO STAND IN THE FREEZING COLD FOR TWO AND A HALF HOURS, TO FINALLY GET A TRAIN INTO PENN STATION... TO GO TO WORK.

You know what really, really, really, really grates on me? When someone makes a statement, then says "Why?", then answers their own question.

Example:

Me: "I don't like sardines."
Stupid Person: "I like sardines. Why? Because they are the only friends I have."

The "why" is completely unnecessary. If you are giving support for your statement, a "because" is sufficient. Or, you can end your sentence and begin a new sentence providing the support for your argument. Saying "Why?" between thoughts makes you sound like a pompous, arrogant blowhard and immediately reduces the validity of your supporting statement.

Saying "because" instead of "why" - it's a good thing.

A short article on the website that singlehandedly ruined indie rock for me, basically because it epitomizes the insular, holier-than-thou, inablility to express enjoyment in a non-ironic manner wankfest that is, in effect, the present day hipster. They manage to stay in my daily rotation of web surfing because I haven't found a decent source of daily music news, but right next to their news column lurks the daily reviews. Each and everyday I click on the main review du jour, knowing that the pretentiousness and lack of rounded musical knowledge is going to grate on my nerves and make me subconsciously tighten the grip on my coffe cup. I skim through the review, go "C'mon, just get to the point! Who has time to read this garbage!," and then go over to the New York Times or BBC News and remind myself that, along with the staff of Pitchfork and much of the rest of the country, I spend too much time worrying about stuff that doesn't matter.

an open letter to the individuals who decide what videos are to be shown on the televisions at the gym:

-people go to the gym for a number of reasons, and many expect to be active when they go. while I enjoy artists such as sarah mclachlan and norah jones, something a bit more uptempo might be a bit more appropriate when we're benchpressing and jogging on the treadmill.
-none of the patrons at the gym are under 18 years of age. it may also be nice to not be forced to listen to music aimed at the "tween" demographic. also, many of these videos appear to be a few years old and from teeny bopper artists that never made it big during the big bubble-gum goldrush of a few years ago. i really don't think these artists are going to find a second wind with the gym crowd.
-r.e.m. is one of my all time favorite groups, but ten years ago the entire world, in a rare display of solidarity, got together and decided that "shiny happy people" should never ever ever be heard again.

that is all.

do you know the truth about cicadas? have you ensured that your children will not get eaten alive by these huge monstrous beasts? don't say i didn't warn you.

all kidding aside, i really don't remember anything special happening the last time the cicadas emerged. it's not like these things were piled up all over the grass, dancing in the streets, and eating my rocky road cereal. i don't think anybody even mentioned them. to top things off, even though i'd seen the word before, i've never heard anyone even say the word cicada before this year. i was convinced it was one of those crazy words that was pronounced completely differently from the way it was spelled.

i guess the media needs something inconsequential to latch onto, and it's not shark attack season yet, so there you have it.

as someone who plays videogames occasionally (like when it's cold and snowy outside) i often disagree with a lot of discussions about violence in games. although i tend to not play violent games (i prefer games like zelda where you figure out riddle after riddle), i don't think shooting games like doom or halo are going to give birth to a generation of sharpshooting trenchcoat mafiosos. the fun in those games is more of the have-fun-while-you-kick-your-friend's-ass variety. and, i was a huge fan of the controversial grand theft auto 3. it was simply an amazingly crafted piece of work, not unlike the sopranos, which is also noticeably violent. as long as this stuff is kept out of kids' hands, i don't have a problem with it.

however, the producers of grand theft auto have just released a new title that severely crosses lines of decency for any medium; manhunt. in manhunt, you play the part of a character that is for some reason or another coerced by a snuff-film maker into performing a series of very very sadistic murders for his videos. there is a six minute video of footage from the game circulating on the net now which i will not link to, because the visuals are simply too deranged. if grand theft auto is the sopranos, manhunt is faces of death. we're talking disemboweling individuals with a chainsaw here.

where's the fun in that?

i also don't understand why companies hold back on vpn. this is basically the jist of my story.

them: "we're going to need you to do some testing for us late at night and on the weekends to ensure the conversion goes well. here's your laptop, beeper, blah blah blah"
me: "ok, i have dsl at home, so this won't be too bad"
them: "well, actually, you'll have to dial in. we wont' be able to give you vpn"
me: "uh, but i have dsl, how can i do anything over a 56k connection"
them: "well, you can check your e-mail"
me: "but receiving and sending attachments is going to take forever, not to mention everything else that i'll need to do"
them: "...."
me: "so, basically, the laptop is worthless, and i'm going to have to come in on weekends now"
them: "..."

so, i'm doing some research for this year's christmas shopping, and amazon always seems to be the best place to do that. but, man, those customer reviews are like a tennis match. the first review is like "oh my god, i've had this for three years now, and it changed my life". the next review is "this thing is crap. it broke after a week and it gave my dog cancer". the thing is, it's like this for every product. the staff reviews aren't much help, as they're usually just "this is a good product and this is what it does". grrrr!

so, yesterday i walk into the gym and there's a spinning class going on. now, usually, spinning class looks like hell on earth to me. there's jersey shore "house" music pitched up to 160 bpm's blaring in the room and everyone looks like they're about to die, either from heat exhaustion, a heart attack, or too many drumrolls. but things were noticably more somber in there this time, and i realized they were spinning to "there there" by radiohead. when i got out of the locker room they were listening to "airbag". noone seemed to be in pain, or doing much heavy duty spinning for that matter, they were just kind of riding their bikes at a calm, leisurely pace. note to instructor: you might want to play something a bit more upbeat for your class next time.

the only thing worse than a long meeting is a long conference call meeting. sitting through an hour and a half of someone reading off a powerpoint deck is the perfect remedy for late night insomnia, not the after lunch slump.

people say weird things. like, why do people say "not to mention", then follow that by mentioning something? it just doesn't make sense!

while this is retarded, why don't these guys go up against all the hip hop artists that are propagating such stereotypes for monetary gain?

oh dear, i've become an irresponsible blogger again. right now, i'm on a short breather from school, and it feels grrrreat!!!

basically, this summer has sucked eggs. check this out!

-right around the summer solstice, my wallet got stolen at the gym, and $3000 worth of sporting goods and computer equipment got charged while i was benchin', curlin', and pressin'. i wasn't held responsible for any of it, but it took weeks for me to get all my identification and platinum purchasing power back.
-field day fest was $100, and it rained all day!
-it then rained every weekend in june!
-we got bed bugs! yes, bed bugs. because of some stupid hippychicks who've since left the building next to us, we're now paying $2000 a month for third world conditions. do you know what it's like going to bed at night knowing that something is going to creep out and suck blood out of you?
-the siren fest was a total letdown! the music was just not loud enough to overpower the sound of the cyclone and the stage wasn't high enough to actually see the bands performing. thus, you had a bunch of kids who thought they were the hottest thing since sliced bread for standing around in a trucker hat and acting as miserable as possible.
-i had one day of fun in the sun, and got the worst sunburn of my life! so for a week, i went to bed in pain while waiting to get the blood sucked out of me.
-we're converting from oracle to s.a.p. at work, so inbetween cramming for my midterms and finals (which in summer semesters, come every two weeks), i had to sit in on meetings everyday while trying to not nod off in a visible manner.

it hasn't been all bad, i've had a blast hanging out at the bars. as homer said, alcohol is the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems ;)

in less fortunate news, nike is buying converse, which is a bit of a double edged sword. on one hand, at least it'll be easier to get your hands on a pair of one stars, which i consider to be the sassiest darn shoes ever designed. on the other hand, get ready for the star-studded marketing blitz.

so, i made it through the field day fest. first of all, it rained all day. second of all, what was supposed to be a sort of celebration of the leftfield (sigur ros were headliners for cyring out loud) and in the tradition of brittain's great reading and glastonbury festivals, ended up being pretty much lollapalooza at giant's stadium. the concert was truncated to one day and the number of bands cut in half (with some shady decisions in that department-spiritualized over sigur ros? ours and gemma hayes (who ever heard of them?) over royksopp). there was noone on the main stage that wasn't on a major label. while it's always great seeing the alterna-rock greats, there was only one electronic act on the bill (underworld, who absolutely rocked and woke the crowd up), and absolutely noone representing the new garage rock stuff that the kids seem to dig these days.

which is not to say the concert sucked, because it didn't. it was actually pretty fun, and would have been really great if it weren't for the cold raininess and numerous technical difficulties that the cold raininess wrought (not the least of which was a stage hand hitting beck in the chest with a metal pipe right before his set, causing him to rush to the hospital and cancel his performance).

by the end of the day, people were pretty much exhausted, uncomfortable, and a bit underwhelmed by the whole thing. then radiohead decided to put on their best show in years. they were absolutely phenomenal, and by the end of their set the wet socks and five dollar ponchos didn't seem to matter so much.

i for one welcome our new synergistically enhanced media regulations. just think of how our nightly news reports will improve:
-guerilla journalism about the week's top 10 grossing movies
-shark attacks: the third summer is always the deadliest summer!
-going shopping can help you lose weight!

i just can't wait!