Intermittently Updated List of Songs I Never Need to Hear Again In My Life, For Real

Fatboy Slim - The Rockafeller Skank

the jet lag makes it even more hilarious

We flew home yesterday/last night (hello time zone craziness!), had an amazing trip, but I felt bad inside when I realized I had no idea what was north of Greece. Now I feel smart!

am i the only person who thought he said "i like puddles"?

We are officially entering the next phase of the internet meme, folks:


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Intermittently Updated List of Songs I Never Need to Hear Again In My Life, For Real

Don McLean - American Pie

i actually don't know what to say

Two that came my way via Towleroad:

Artificial life likely in 3 to 10 years.

Frozen Smoke will save the world.

dude, like wtf is up with china?

dude, like wtf is up with china?

Intermittently Updated List of Songs I Never Need to Hear Again In My Life, For Real

Rise - Public Image Ltd. (Otherwise known as "I may be wrong you may be right" repeated 20 million times by an annoying British guy)

So.... Sanjaya is kind of like the minus world in Super Mario Bros?

An Oxford professor proposes that it is 20% likely we are living within a computer simulation.

Things to learn from this article:
- Everyone probably has that Truman Show phobia to a certain degree
- It's nearly impossible to for us to think outside of our own "fishbowl" of sorts, and it's only recently become relatively easy for us to consider the possibility that extra-terrestrials could exist because 99.9% of our entertainment revolves around fictional situations in which extra-terrestrials exist
- Oxford professors probably smoke a lot more ganja than I had previously considered

remember "cotton eye joe"?

This is the best record review I've read in a while.

getting ahead in the lucrative field of artist management

A lot like checkers, but exactly like pool:



I can't begin to imagine what the rules of the game could possibly be. Origami instructions make more sense.

why don't they just call it "stand on stage so people can clap for you!"

Just like everything else I love, Japanese Human Tetris has been ripped-off and made completely lame. I present to you, Human Tetris, with easier shapes and more attractive contestants:



These people have the reflexes of.... something with really slow reflexes. Anyway, this will be the last you ever see me reference Human Tetris ever again. Now excuse me while I go cancel my flight to Japan, hide under my desk, and sulk. Anybody got any Morissey CDs?

By the way, what's the guy in the second team hiding here? Can I get a translation, yo?

so that's how they stay so thin

More fun Japanese gameshow stuff in case you have a case of the Mondays.


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when i download music, it makes me dance

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but this blog has once again proven to be its very own psychic friends network. Remember when I discussed that Freestyle digital archive organization? Well, it's here... in blog form!

still not as exciting as plinko

Sometimes I'm convinced I should move to Japan just for the game shows. Why on Earth doesn't the Game Show Network show this stuff?

still way better than the Go-Bots

New Transformers movie = kinda awesome and kinda really bad at the same time.

i'm losing control... i'm losing control

By the way, if you ran over to apple.com to check out Safari for Windows like I did, you might want to uninstall it for the time being.

it was kinda minimal, and kinda the best night ever

So, I ended up dragging my tired bum to Mayer and Boratto at Cielo. I'm pretty sure that the last time I enjoyed myself this much at a club, Clinton was our president and the Twin Towers were still standing. I left about three hours later than I set out to (that was three hours of looking at my watch and going "OK, just one more song and I'll go").

Highlights of the night:
- The opening DJs dropping better music than I've heard most top tier NYC favorites spinning for the past seven years
- Boratto spinning the prime cuts from his Chromophobia album, each new blip and thud eliciting roars from the crowd
- Mayer bopping around in front of his laptop (remember records?)
- A rather euphoric clubgoer informing me that I was actually the person that killed Laura Palmer
- Learning the Cielo economy:

- Watered Down Stoli Orange + Tonic = $10 plus $1 tip
- 12oz Amstel Light = $7 plus $1 tip
- 22oz Sapporo = $10 plus $1 tip
- 22oz Sapporo = bargain
- 2 x 22oz Sapporo = bloated on the dancefloor

-Mayer dropping the Carl Craig remix to Junior Boys "Like a Child" at 3 a.m.


Uh-oh point of the night:
- Getting into the cab after everything and realizing I was pretty darn tired after all

Also:
-The back of my head and my arm ended up in a picture on Resident Advisor (I really wasn't trying to make shadow puppets, really I wasn't)
- The New York Times liked it too
!

Intermittently Updated List of Songs I Never Need to Hear Again In My Life, For Real

Beastie Boys - No Sleep 'Till Brooklyn
Beastie Boys - Fight For Your Right (To Party)

It will be so minimial that it will be hardly anything at all

Believe it or not, but despite the deep deep sorrow that I've been in since learning of Jerry Falwell's passing (what a terrible, terrible, terrible, terrible loss!), I've been able to muster the strength to think about other things.

Like, should I go out dancing in a couple weeks?

Before you go "Yeah, wtf?" like you always do, keep in mind that I would need to go out dancing on a Thursday night.

In two weeks, Michael Mayer and Gui Boratto will be spinning together at Cielo. Michael Mayer is my current favorite DJ, and like, never spins in New York. Gui Boratto has just released one of the best albums of the year. Cielo is one of the few decent clubs left in the city. This will easily be one of the best nights out this year.

The thing is, if I go, I'll be really really tired the next day at work. And, I'll need to pull myself out of there kind early-ish if I am to be functional at all the next day. And, I'll be really really really tired. Like, really tired.

What do I do?

Oh..My...God...Happy Friday Y'all!!!

What I am about to link to is the greatest internet link of all time. Although it may not have been obvious before, the internet was invented for the sole purpose of distributing this link.

Listen to the audio on this page, which features an off duty police officer calling 911 because he is convinced that he and his wife are overdosing on marijuana. He tells the operator that they're dead, and then a couple minutes later asks for the score on the Redwings game, and then his mother in law stops by. I love this stuff.