so, yesterday morning i had my usual "ugghh, i have to get ready for work" frustration. it's not that i hate going to work, i hate getting ready for work. brush teeth, listerine, gargle, shave, don't cut face, try to make sideburns somewhat even, wait for shower to get near desired temperature, wash self, dry self, put contacts in, don't burn eyes while doing so, apply deoderant, apply pomade, try to pick out decent outfit in near-comatose state. you'd think with doing this day after day, i'd have the whole process down to a cool clean 5 minutes, but nooooo. and resultingly, i find myself fantasizing about having a sonic shower like janeway on voyager.

then, while in the shower, i started singing (well, in my head) the banana boat song, but instead of "c'mon mister tally-man, tally me banana" i started singing "c'mon mister taliban, get out of afghanistan", i pretty much had a whole song written in 5 minutes. if mad tv or snl haven't done this already, i'm getting myself a brand spankin' new job.